Monday, March 14, 2011
Does anybody know how to hold my heartHow to hold my heart?Cause I don't want to let go, Let go, let go too soonI want to tell you so before the sun goes darkHow to hold my heartCause I don't want to let goLet go, let go of youThe hardest part is knowing that he has moved on while you remained footed at square one, hopelessly still very much in love with him. It hurt so much the night when I had learnt the truth. The truth that I've been trying so hard to avoid. No matter how much crying I did, couldn't numb the pain that I was feeling inside. I had been so silly for putting my heart on the line when I knew I had everything to lose but I've always believed that was what love was all about. You give and you give even when you've nothing left.
Admist all the hurt that I was feeling, I know God was with me the whole time. Carrying me through that night. He sent me angels to comfort and love me. :) I don't know what would I have done without Becs and Ryo that night.
"We need courage to take the necessary steps to move on with our lives, whether those steps are leaving someone or something behind, or returning to the brokenness and taking action to put the pieces back together again. When our woundedness involves a situation that is unmendable, then there comes a time when we have to cease our attempts to put those pieces of our life together. The healing of our spirit will come when we let go of the past, stop trying to have things be as they used to be, get on with our lives, and tend to what is before us."
- The Unmendable Cup
I have been so blind to the many opportunities that God has placed in front of me and it is only when I decide to let go and let live that they will become clear to me. I felt a lightness to my heart after praying and doing some quiet time. I know this healing is going to take some time and that I may never be whole again, but it's when I take that first step, then I can begin to see the good and wonderful things that God has installed for me.
On a happier note, the professor coordinating the Honours programme for Accounting has put me through for Semester 2 2011. I also received my 3rd Letter of Commendation from the Head of School of Accounting. My heart smiled when my mum smiled after I broke the news to her. This is for you, I love you so much. :)
It's about finding the courage to move on..>> We heal so that we can continue to heal others :)l
------
